Sexy likes to show a lot of skin,

Sexy has the need to be really, really thin.

Sexy puts gloss on her soft and luscious lips,

Sexy gets men to touch her and her child bearing hips.

Sexy likes the all the attention she can get,

Sexy likes the men that can get her real wet.

Sexy has a secret nobody else would know,

Sexy likes it when men call her a hoe.

Sexy has the need to look like those Americans seen in the media,

Sexy ended up shipping herself on Expedia.

Sexy left her homeland. Most of all, she made a decision,

Sexy wanted to help out her mother, so she got a job in the Mission.

Sexy, a whole new person, looking like trash,

Sexy resulted in selling herself on the street for some cash.

Sexy did this for many months now,

Sexy had this idea her mother would say “wow”.

Sexy knew it was wrong when her mother found out,

Sexy started to cry, she started to pout.

Sexy realized she wasn’t very happy at all,

Sexy wanted to impress her mother, but all she did was fall.

Sexy knew this wasn’t the way her mother raised her, for sure,

Sexy thought that this was the only cure.

Sexy quit her job and finally said goodbye,

Sexy moved back home, ashamed that she had to lie.

Sexy’s mother embraced her, she had a confession,

“Sexy, I love you and I hope you’ve learned your lesson, Selling yourself on the street is no profession, See what you experienced was internalized oppression,

“You don’t need to express yourself in that way to become a true star.

Sexy, I love you just the way you are.”

By: Me

Dear HYPHEN,

First and for most, I want to say thank you. Thank you for exposing this type of magazine to the community. This is something that not only Asians and Asian Americans need to read about but it is also something that the whole world needs to discover. Finally, the Asian and Asian American voices are being heard especially through written forms of art. I definitely like how everyone that is a part of HYPHEN is a volunteer. I think it’s great that the magazine editors are doing this non paid work out of passion and strive for the Asian American community. Think about it this way, a true hero is a hero who doesn’t ask for a reward in the end.

As I flipped through Issue #18 Summer 2009, A few articles caught my eye. First the article about the Kogi truck reminded me of a summer birthday trip I had taken for my 22^nd birthday. I took a trip down to Southern California and had my first Kogi experience. Though it was not the Kogi truck, it was a bar that served Kogi dishes. It was amazing! In the Sweet Dreams article, Choi, the face of the Kogi BBQ, states that “[Kogi] creates a sense of family”. For me, food is what brings people together. Food can bring a family together at a dinner table, food can reacquaint two old friends together, or food can plainly be a wonderful eating experience. I think it’s great that more and more people are trying to fuse different cultures together. The Kogi truck is a perfect example of two great cultures coming together to share an experience. A Kogi dish consists of the Korean BBQ fused with the Mexican preparation, like the taco shell, or the tortilla. I would encourage anyone to eat this special dish because not only are you taking in or digesting the food you eat, but you are learning about the different cultures as you take in the Kogi experience.

Just this past semester, I had taken a class called Asian Americans in the mass media (AAS 693). In this class, I learned about the history of Asians in Hollywood through time. When looking through the Hyphen magazine, I came across the article about Hollywood not bending, where Maveric Vu, the writer, talks about Asian American films achieving mainstream success. I believe that Asian American artists are getting out there in the community through different social networks like blogs, youtube, and magazines like HYPHEN. Through the Hollywood history, there has been this term of “whitewashing” where western influences are placed upon Asians. Many times Asians in the media fall into playing that particular stereotypical character which makes it seem like they’re okay with that decision. It makes it okay for Hollywood executives to place Asians in that type of role; when in fact it is not okay. “If we fight for more equality from Hollywood and we treat this casting as a slap in the face, then in the future, we might be able to stop it from happening again”.

Being active in the community is something that I plan to do even after college. I like being involved in the community and surrounding myself in others that feel the same way. The article ‘Marget Cho Stands Up’, she  states “Asian Americans need to be more active in the community”. Then she states an incident with Miley Cirus basically making fun of Chinese people or even Asians at that. In the picture below, you can see that there actually is an Asian in the picture, but he is plays along with making fun of his own kind. Why can’t Asian Americans stand up to that and take pride in who they are instead of following the crowd? I think people are scared to admit that there is a problem and don’t want to face the truth. ASIANS NEED TO SPEAK UP AND BE ACTIVE!

http://7×7.com/content/e/big-do-sf-250-things-do-you-die

For the past two weeks, I’ve been having dreams every other day of me and him. Only in every dream we’re happy and he’s always behind me either hugging me or talking to me. Before something important happens I always seem to wake up because either my alarm goes off for school, or I get woken up somehow. But it’s always right before something important is going to happen. It’s like in the movies when you know something is going to happen next except without the music in the background.

Last Thursday at D&Bs he was there. I was glad to see him and see him socialize with others.. but things were different. For the most part, he was behind me. I don’t know if he expected me to talk to him the whole time or expected me to give him all his attention, but I didn’t do any of that. He left early and that was that.

Coincidence? Not sure if that was a dream-reality moment but I didn’t realize it till JAR pointed it out. Nobody else is going to be social with him but me. I WAS all he had.. and now, NOTHING.

It’s hard because I’m not the type of person to just give up. I’m always the one wanting to try. I’m always the one who puts 100% and more into the relationship, and I’ve put up with it for too long. Second chances only last for so long. Especially if no lesson is learned. A healthy relationship deserves communication, trust, honesty, and love. In this relationship I questioned every single one of those. But why is that?

Boosted his ego when he joined the group. I knew it wasn’t a good idea to begin with. Everything with him is he never had to try, never had to work for anything and he gets what he wants. What is that?

to be continued…

Almost one year ago I had an epiphany and typed it out but never posted it anywhere. Today, I came across this document that I had typed out and realized that what I had written still holds true for today. I guess it was an epiphany within an epiphany. A sign to get my life in check again.

THOUGHTS 9.25 “There’s black & then there’s white”– Nella’s mama (you should hear the story!)
Funny story, but yet so true. Sometimes people stress over the silliest things when there are other more important things in life to worry about. Or sometimes the answer is so simple yet things somehow get so complicated. Everyday people are so wrapped up in this world trying to look good for other people when really you’re making yourself look stupid. Take a second to breathe and meditate. This world isn’t just made up of two colors, black and white. This world is so colorful and so bright that it should be appreciated instead of worrying about the lesser things in life.

Nobody is alone in this world. Yes, things can and will stress you out, but things will get better. As a community, yes, everyone is struggling in some way or another. That’s why you focus on the greater things in life like your friends and family. Definitely, they are your support system. Not because they have to, but because they want to. They want to help guide you through the right path.

Take a breather or two and let it all out. It’s good to let things out once in a while especially if it’s what’s been bugging you inside.

Priorities. What does that even mean? By definition, somebody or something important: is ranked highly in terms of urgency. I guess what it‘s saying is…Get it right. Only you know what you have to do. You can’t just sit and wait for someone to tell you to do things otherwise… how are you going to learn? Only you spend the most time with yourself (thanks Dai). Only you know how you’re going to act and how you choose to do things a certain way. Have you ever wondered if in one situation you hadn’t done things a certain way, it could change the whole course of your life? (butterfly effect anyone?) Scary….

Sometimes you need reassurance to know why you’re doing the things you do. Its good to realize on your own because it puts you in check.

Life is a growing process. You learn about something, you think about it, and then you apply it in your everyday life. It’s kinda crazy how everything is coming full circle. Between what you learned in life and school, you can actually apply things and know how and why they happen the way they do.

There are so many distractions out there and cell phone is one of them. Try
Turning it off for a whole day and you’ll see how much you really don’t need it. Use that time to think and spend time with your thoughts.

LIVE YOUR LIFE.

Yes, today it August 1st. The start of a new month, new beginnings, new memories, and togetherness. As much as I am excited, I don’t know why I’m not completely happy. I know I have every reason to be happy… I have my family, faith, and friends that care about me. I guess I’m just healing still.. and I will get better in time.

RECAP week of July 26

Monday, July 27- My first class was short and sweet. Class started at 9, and we got out by 930 because of the midterm on tuesday. Second class was a bore. Guest speaker talking about the history of wine. poop! Afterwards, I bought some wine at Bevmo with JAR second for 5cents. Ended up getting a 2007 Valentin Chardonnay(sounds smart! haha) and drank the night away with JAR watching Miss Congeniality & Sydney White. I was also suppose to be studying buuuuut…

Tuesday, July 28- Midterm time. Last person to leave the room. Don’t know if that’s a good thing or not? Afterwards, Embarcadero with Ster. It was good to get out the ugly fog. Lots of things to see and places to go. Ferry Building to Pier 39 is a looong walk. well not really..as long as you have someone to talk to. Had lunch at an Italian place which overlooked the sealions being lazy on the dock. Got a lasagna which was really big and really good!!! Ended the adventure by walking back to the MUNI and meeting up with Kas as she got off of work.

Wednesday, July 29- Got the midterm back. Didn’t do as well as I thought I was going to, but still a decent grade. Went over the test and got to go home early. No second class today, so I stayed home to chill with Mary as she was putting up her decor on her wall. Some fun quotes I heard Mary say were “Let’s get the pourrrdey stoouarded!!!” and “TADURRR” meaning “TADAA”. Later on that night Mary and I cooked dinner for the fams. Garlic parmesan Chicken with Mushroom Pasta & wine. Later on we had funzies playing the board game “I’ve never…” where you answer question about what you’ve done or haven’t done and as a result you must do certain tasks. Poor Mark Diao had to do alll of everyones tasks =(( Ended the night around 2 as I fell asleep on the living room couch. A GOOD NIGHT!

Thursday, July 30- Last day of class for the week. Wasn’t too bad, the same ol’ same. Today is also the day of my photoshoot with alisteralarva & friends. Concept: Up, up & away. Balloons make me happy especially the colorful ones!! Already was an adventure as we went to pick up balloons at the store. Got to Delores Park thinking the weather was gonna be nicer, but it wasn’t. A little bit of sun was peeping through every now and then, but mostly very windy. I didn’t realize how hard it was to handle balloons in the wind. After a long day of photographing, ate at L&L which definitely hit the spot! Also, went to D&Bs later that night for LENA’s birthday! She was druuuunk! and it was a frickin LOGAN reunion. Everyone was there that night. CRAZYYY!

Friday, July 31- Just a chill and lazydayyy.. watched August Rush, Juno, and Ellen show.  Ster & JAR came over to watch the secret. Didn’t start my paper till about 12AM. JAR went away and then came back & me and Ster had to take care of him.

Totally wrote this blog earlier and then it got erased. booo

The reason for my headliner: the EAST BAY was sooooo sunny. I LOVE the weather, I LOVE the people, I LOVE my home. “and then the gray clouds hover the blue sky”. Weather is horrible in the city. Makes me not wanna be here at all. But I can’t do anything about it.. its my other home.

RECAP last weekend

Friday highlightsKaraoke: Hayward karaoke; bring your own drinks; flashing lights; togetherness; funzies with the people I haven’t seen in a while!

Saturday highlights -shopping in Santana Row & Palo Alto, bluechalk: Mary, Jello, and I; the magic number 3; heels; Jetta; my place; moms food =]]]]

Sunday highlights- Gilroy Garlic Festival: 8am wake up call; one & a half hour drive; good parking!; 3 beers before 12pm; eye80; rain room; GARLIC; escargot; garlic fries; 80-90 degree weather; hermet crab; nap time

HELLOO! Today is my first time blogging on the wordpress I forgot I made about a year ago. Crazy how I hadn’t blogged since I had Xanga!

take a look! haha remember this was a loooong time ago… http://terriboo.xanga.com/weblogpreview

LIFE. So, woke up late today for summer school. Went to sleep around 4 so that’s probably why, but I got up and decided to go to class anyways. I got down the elevator and walked to the end of the street and turn back to walk home cause I was cold AND I didn’t want to go into the class hella late cause I think it’s rude and disrespectful to the teacher. Besides, I’ve been to every single class day for 2 weeks.. so I’ve actually been good!

Decided to kinda dress up today just so I won’t be a bum all day. Dressing up makes me feel alive haha as corny as it sounds, I just feel better about my day if I dress up and get out.

Ended up at Sutro Heights for a photoshoot with Ster & Geraldine. Ugly weather, but I guess you gotta do what you gotta do.

Barracudas for HAPPY HOUR with Ster, Geraldine, & Jeremy. It was fun catching up on old times and of course eating for cheap is always a plus. THANK YOU for a good outting!

Dinner at Mark’s house + FRIENDS = funzies!

Watched SYTYCD & Night at the Museum. Just a chill night with the lovely people in my life =]]

FASHION. This week I am totally into the nail polish at FOREVER. I have about 12 of the colors, and still planning on getting more =] Planning to buy a 50’s dress for the photoshoot coming up soon by alisteralarva (which I will not mention the theme yet).

GOODBYE. Quote of the day: “It’s a newwwwww dayyy!” – cast of Mahalaya